One day before leaving

Aiccehhh, tajuk entri nak touching touching je kan.. Tapi, seriously! Tak tau nak gambarkan perasaan, bila duk jauh-jauh from husband. Sedih, ok.. Tapi, nak buat macam mana kan… masing-masing ada commitment. So, bear with it je laa stakat ni. Insyaallah, hopefully ada rezeki untuk husband dpt keje di semenanjung. Ameennn..

Esok dah nak blik Penang for 2 weeks. Sedih tu, xpayah citer laa. Last month pun duk di Penang almost 2 weeks without husband pon, ari-ari nanges. Mase first day die xde tu pon.. seharian terperap lam bilik, nanges2 sampai bengkak mata. Ibu mengandung ni sensitip btol kan.. -_-” Esok nak naik flight pon.. xtau laaa, sure bergenang-genang air mata nih.. Tapi, husband still pujuk-pujuk. Suruh kuatkan semangat… and jangan tension-tension.. kesian dkat baby nnt. huuuu~ Ya, I know. Perasaan ibu pun affected baby jugak kan. Insyaallah, I’ll try to be stronger than before, syg.

Today husband still keje. Pukul 5 ptg jupgi bru sampai rumah. Sementara tunggu dia balik and nak kuar dating before balik… Tadi da siap iron baju keje husband for 2 weeks.. prepared ayam/ bahan mentah sume2 untuk dia masak nanti. Huhuhu, time iron baju tadi pun da sedih sedih. Tsk! Be strong pleaseee.. -_-”

Ouh, btw dalam sedih sedih tu.. saya rasa agak teruja juga. You know what, tomorrow we’re going to have 3d/4d pregnancy scan!! ^^ Yelah, pegi KKIA hari tu, xjupe doc pon. sbb dia kata saya adalah sehat. So, no use untuk jumpa doc. Then, Mr. husband and I sibuklah duk survey2 maternity klinik here where got 3d/4d pregnancy scan. Almaklumlah… di bintulu ni susah sket nak ada klinik yang provide all the high tech equipment kan. So, ktorg da jumpe one klinik ni and decide untuk pergi ke Klinik Dr. Lau. Tadi sempat lg call that klinik and Insyaallah… ktorg akan pergi scan our little dearest tomorrow morning! ^^ Excited tauuu ibu dan ayah nak tengok baby. ^^ heeee~

If let say, esok baby tunjuk-tunjuk die punye ehem2.. boleh lah ibu shopping sket2 barang-barang baby time ibu dkat penang nnt. Right now xde beli ape sangat pun lagi. Just beli one set The first year breastflow starter set and diaper travel bag je. All clothing material xnk beli lagi… nak tunggu tau gender baby dulu. hik3~

Ok, ni la starter set untuk feeding bottle baby nnt:

Harga for this starter set adalah RM 71.91 and starter set ni include:

- two 5 oz bottles with two Stage 1 nipples and bottle covers,

- two 9 oz bottles with two Stage 2 flow nipples and bottle covers,

- a unique snap-to-bottle container,

- a bottle brush.

Agak jimat jugak laaa kan.. sbb kalo kter purchase 1 bottle pon dah RM 19.90. Kat dalam ni ade 4 bottles and teats lagi…So, dah save di situ kan. This starter set I purchased from OBW (One Baby World Boutique). Rasa berbaloi-baloi..

Okeh, yang kat atas tu travel diaper bag yang baru dibeli. Hmm, somehow I pun wonder, why I choose this light blue color. hahaha~ Tapi, xkesah lahhhhh kalo baby girl pon, still the design look cute what.. And the price of the bag pon quite reasonable.. RM44. This bag adalah dibeli daripada Baby Esyad Dream Collection. Knape eh, saya beli travel bag ni awal awal? Nanti time confinement bukan nak g travel travel pon kan? haha~ No, no… the reason is, nnt boleh laa letak brg2 baby and ibu untuk packing packing for preparation ke hospital nanti. Nampak cumel sket kannnn.. kannnn..~ hahahaha!!

Stakat ni, beli itu je la dulu kot. Tu pon online, takde nye saya nk beli kat Bintulu neh. The price here is quite expensive and not so many choices pun yang ade. Barang-barang yang lain-lain maybe akan dibeli di Penang…~^^ Dearie syg, esok jangan malu-malu, kepit-kepit ye time doc scan… Ibu dan ayah xsaba nak tau your gender tauuuu… till then~ ^^

Lupa

Hari ini, saya mula tersedar akan sesuatu. Sesuatu yang hampir hilang daripada jasad ini. Yang mula luput memori untuk menekan nekan butang butang keyboard, seraya mengungkap kata dan menyampai maksud. Lupa. Saya betul-betul lupa bagaimana cara untuk menulis, meluah, merangkap pada entri di ruang kecil ini. Ruang ini mungkin kecil, walhal ruang kecil ini mampu memberi 1001 penawar pada saya suatu ketika dulu. Waktu saya tidak punya siapa siapa yang rapat untuk luah kecamuk di hati. Mudah betul lupa.

Mujur tatkala berbicara dengan kenalan lama, saya salin&tampal alamat blog ini pada dia. Konon mahu memperkenalkan pemilik blog tersebut, konon konon mahu memperkenalkan dia pada pemilik blog tersebut. Dah macam agen cari jodoh pulak. Ok, cut it out. Lantas, dengan tidak sengaja saya membaca tiap kata dan baris ayat di blog tersebut. Dan, satu perasaan yang dulu pernah hinggap di dalam diri muncul kembali. Senyap senyap ia menyapa. Rindu betul. Sudah sekian lama perasaan itu menyepi, mendiam diri. Semenjak saya sibuk dengan urusan menulis thesis. Rasa itu kian lama kian menyepi. Tidak pernah ia menonjol diri, dan saya juga tidak sedar akan kesepian itu buat kesekian kalinya.

Sekarang, maksud saya.. kala ini, tangan ini mula menari nari di atas butang butang keyboard. Walau ada langkah yang masih sumbang dan kekok di sini sana, saya masih truskan. Kerna rasa sayang terhadap rasa yang muncul kembali buat kesekian kalinya, saya gagahkan diri. Tidak mahu saya lupa. Bukan kacang lupakan kulit. Bukan , saya. Pernah suatu ketika saya ditimpa tekanan yang maha dasyat, jauh dari keluarga dan tidak ada siapa siapa mahu meminjamkan telinga.. di sini juga saya coretkan dan luahkan. Sedikit sebanyak, dapat juga kurangkan tekanan yang menimpa.

Sungguh saya berterima kasih pada blog tersebut yang mengingat kan saya pada keindahan kata dan ayat. Sungguh. Juga pada pemilik blog tersebut yang menginspirasikan saya dalam bidang ini di awal tahun 2007. Terima kasih!! Truely inspired by yours, Kak Sue!! ^^

-nuna-

Letting out the upset

Somehow, I totally don’t understand people. Seriously, not. To be specified, a friend. Or should I say stranger now? Never mind. But I totally upset on what he actually did to me. Yeah, he WAS a friend of mine. I don’t know the fact that he had a crush on me since form 1 (that time, budak-budak lagi kot… lol). Seriously, I don’t have any idea.. until last year, a friend of mine told me this story; yada, yada, yadaaa.. and what-so-ever. Thus, I decided just to keep that story and don’t want to react on it, since he already has one special someone which is also my FRIEND, plussssssssssss I don’t have feeling towards him at all. So, why should I care?

Even though at that time I’m still single, but I’m not the type that want to grab any men and have a lovey dovey thingy just for the sake of the loneliness. Nope, I’m not that kind of person. Love is something that can’t be forced. It is the master key that  opens the gates of happiness. And I valued that. Plus, I’m considering his girlfriend. You know, it’s not nice to steal other boyfriend or be bitchy on her. Karma, babes.. karma. Please, don’t.

So, I stick on my previous decision. Keep silence. Until one day, he himself wrote an e-mail to me and confessed his feeling towards me. Yet, same response from me; nothing replied. Because I’m afraid he might be hurt if he knows the truth and I don’t know how to handle this. So, silence is the best option I guess. Alhamdulillah, I thought that was a good way to avoid him and let him has a happy life with his current girlfriend. Sweet am I? LoL~ A month passed, and I found that both of them engaged; and I was like relieved-and-happy seeing them together. Yes, I’m happy for them. Honestly. And relieved because he letting me go.

And today.. after browsing facebook and searching for some friend, I realized something. You know what, he removed me as his friend. Pfffffffffffftttttttttttt!!! Okay, on positive side.. I know he is trying to forget me and want to continue his life. But, it’s not fair you know. I’m like a victim in this situation, and suddenly he put all the blame on me. deng! Yes, I can say that I don’t care if he removed me from his friend list; since i have another 800++ friends in the list. But!! You know, I valued each of my friend. All of them. Quite sakit hati. Tapi, dah orang tak nak kawan.. xpelah! Like I care, kan? (but, I do.. )

-nuna-

dude, 4 years already!!!

Yayy for me! It has been 4 years since I started blogging. From 2007, at first using Friendster account and after that moving to blogspot.com and finally I changed to wordpress.com. The reason is simple. Because I love wordpress features more. You can put a password protected for private posts, the configurations for wordpress are more systematic, and I love the simplicity that it offered. Yeah, of course it has several limitations; such as.. for html purpose, the function is quite limited and you need to buy your own domain first. Instead of that… for css editing also got limitation. But I don’t care, I love wordpress more! LoL~

Just now I imported all of my posts from my previous blog (teruteruashita.blogpsot.com) to this blog. Thus, the post counts are 391 posts!! Walla~~ Almost 400 posts had been produced for  duration of 4 years. Okeh, bangga kejup! Of course, I am… since I’m just a passive blogger and too lazy to update post, but you know~ 400 posts in 4 years are quite a big number for me. Well~ heh!

If you read all the posts, you can see the trend of my writing, the movement of my life, and you can also see the changes of  my character. Yes, those are precious memories of mine. The greatest impact among the years is year 2009. Where I’m totally changed and learn a lot from my past. The year where I endured everything alone, always being in a gloomy mode, always giving a fake smiles for the sake of others happiness and being such a tough woman. Those memories created who I am today. Really.

Thus, hopefully this blog writing can last forever and the lust for writing is still here. Because, you know… this blog is a therapy for the soul of mine. I know I can live without it, but still… later on I will surely look after it. When reading back every written memories, the feeling I felt was a good one.

-nuna-

Protected: Realistic I am.

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